*dances*

Nothing quite puts you in the Christmas spirit like selling books back. I don't know if I've ever left Bradley Book Company a happy, or even content, person. But atleast I wasn't irate like I was last time they screwed me over. I left with $45.25 this time. I think that's the most I've ever gotten back. I coulda got more from the University bookstore if my humanities book wasn't jacked up. I ponder exactly what I could do with it. I already had planned to throw it at something, and when I returned to the 2E, there stood Lesil, who got to sell her book back. So I threw it at her. I might've broken her hip.

Well, school is done for. We had that humanities final this morning. It doesn't matter that we had a three hour hardcore study session last night. BarbCobb effed up my world, let me tell you. But I don't even care clip.

So now we're on the downhill slide. All I gotta do is pack. Nothing left for school. So maybe it resembles something more like a cliff rather than a hill. A cliff I could jump from, maybe? Nah, I don't feel the need to jump off one anymore, but had you pointed me towards a cliff anywhere between 8:00 and 9:30 this morning, I woulda come a-runnin'.

I gotta submit my short story and poetry to Notations, too, but that's no big deal. A matter of printing this stuff off and taking it to the seventh floor of Faculty before noon tomorrow. I really hope I get something published in there. I would like to see my short story in there, but most of all, I just want "Children of a Melancholy Mother" to make it. Ann, my poetry professor, despised that poem and I don't know why. I really liked it. It would make me ecstatic to see it published in there just prove Ann wrong. But truthfully, it's not that great of a poem. It would just be a nice little gesture of literary revenge. Hmm, as a matter of fact, I should probably go submit that stuff right now. I don't want to have to mess with it tomorrow, though I don't know what time Faculty Hall closes during finals. I guess there are still finals for night classes going on.

Alright, well, I'm out.

a hundred bad guys with swords

I am always so happy after finals. I mean, I still have two left, but the weight of two has been lifted off of me. So much so that I walked back from Faculty Hall with Janitha singing Disney songs. I am fully aware that makes me a homosexual seven-year-old, but what can you do? I took our picture. I also took Lance's picture on the elevator this morning. It's a sad time, those two going to Spain next semester.

This afternoon, Justin's gonna come over, and we're going to "study" for our EDP final. That ought to be fun. The "studying," that is. I'll be so glad to be done with that class. It was definitely the worst. It was just a burden having to go to a class so late in the day and worrying about all those observations that I never did. But as time wore on, I realize ol' Lewis ain't that bad. After all, he is god.

My sister called while I was out partying--I mean, taking finals. She wants me to call her back. I hate calling her at work. I feel like I'm intruding and it's some uncover operation because she whispers and stuff. Strange times. But I guess if I was a patient at the gyno, I wouldn't want to listen to my nurse talk to her sister either.

making friends with shadows on my wall

I don't if I have anything to blog about, but it's in the one o'clock hour of the morning and: I'm not too tired. (Have I even been up for twelve hours yet?) Nobody's online to talk to. I don't want to study for my finals, even though that's probably the one thing I should been doing.

I love school and all, but I am so ready to go home. And think most people would agree with me in saying that all of us just need to get out for a while. Of course, a month is a long time. But for mental health purposes, it's time for some new scenery. I miss going out with my family. And just knowing what's going on. Being away at college just completely puts me out of the loop. Not just with home, but the world. I should really start watching the news or something. Ha. The theme music from CNN Headline News reminds me of being home, actually.

So I started this out saying that I wasn't tired, but now I'm yawning all over the place like a mankey. And all this yawning is making my head hurt. There's nothing else to do and I don't have anything to say really, so I think I'm going to go to bed. And lay there and think about things.

if it ever gets bad, i mean really bad

So the Freak Suite Retreat was good tonight. And by good, I mean depressing. Good lord, after Love Actually, I couldn't find a bridge, a cliff, a pit of poisonous snakes, a pit of quick-sand, a seat in Lesil's car fast enough. It's nice to know that love actually is all around us, or whatever the theme of that movie was, but it also did a nice job of pointing out that love actually is one thing I really wish I had. I mean, I love people, and I'm sure there are some people out there who love me, but love. A lot of people like love stories because it reminds them of what they have or what they will have or whatever, but of course, it reminds me of what I don't have. But even worse, it makes me fear what I may never have. I think I would be okay if I knew that one, five, ten, thirty years down the road, I would find the love of my life, that person that will make my world complete, that person who I will share the most perfect bond with. But nothing guarantees that. And that mortifies me. I know I am being pessimistic, but you know, what can you do? I have a problem with logic. I have this idea in my head that because I've never had a boyfriend, my chances of falling in (mutual) love are considerably slimmer than those who have had relationship after relationship. Maybe that's the biggest fallacy known to man, but the only way you can convince me otherwise is by showing me the moment when it happens. And my problem comes full circle.

with the likes of lloyd and stacey may

This has got to be about the most depressing thing I've ever seen. I was wasting my life away at Quizilla, and I took this quiz that is supposed to tell you what movie you'd most likely be in. I was really cool with the "What Kind of Soul Do You Have" quiz that said I have an artistic soul. It was flattering. But this?:





What movie Do you Belong in?(many different outcomes!)
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