in my ears
artist: bebo norman
This crying thing is really becoming a regular event. This time, I was talking to Mom when I broke down. Three days in a row, here I am crying. And it's hard to explain why I am crying because I'm not sure. I do know what I'm crying about, but not why. Probably doesn't make sense, eh?
I'm trying to decide if I want to try to go to Thailand this summer. There are few things I've ever felt such a strong desire to do. But it is more than desire. I feel compelled. I think. It is a huge decision. Part of me is excited at the thought, and the other part is terrified. By leaving this country, or just this town, for two months during the summer, my future will definitely be affected. I could be here taking classes and all that. But I need something to affect me, you know. But I don't want that to be my entire motivation. Anyway, even if I decide I'm going to try to go, I may not be able to. I'll have to go to an interview in Bowling Green in a few weeks. This is huge. I'm not worrying about what it will cost me, financially and otherwise. That's not how I'm weighing this. I want to know if Thailand is where I belong this summer. Because I'm willing to go.